Heidi in Real Life

Unplanned funerals suck.  Don’t blame the dead.   You, as the “still alive” need to prepare a suitable event …and they don’t just plan themselves.  Not unlike a wedding, you need a service complete with DJ (Death Jockey), food, and a venue.   Leaving things to chance or trusting friends and relatives will be the death of YOU!   Funeral Parlors do services all the time.  When you just “can’t”, let the professionals handle it.  These days, there are lots of options--forests, boats, even restaurants.  Funerals are for the living, so if you want a religious element, for God’s sakes, audition the clergy.  The pastor who did my mother’s funeral didn’t take very good notes, and on the day of, said her name wrong and made her sound like a very unfulfilled comptometer operator.  The minister at my father’s service, dressed in a cloak and hat-- a bit like Professor Snape.  At my friend’s recent funeral, at a restaurant, her sister-in...